because I haven’t posted anything in over a month and certain “fans” are complaining… here is something you should all know…
it’s 11:24pm and my cat is systematically brining me each one of his toys and dropping them at my desk. he drops one.. then leaves to get another.
i don’t quite know what to make of this.
wasn’t there a simpsons episode like this? i really want a helper monkey right now… or maybe a baby elephant.
I see, I say, you pay!
Pretty simple guy. In Life or Something Like It he is a homeless man on the streets of Seattle who stands on a soap box and yells visions of the (near) future for all the busy business people to hear as they scramble off to work. As people pass by and hear something useful, like news of a traffic jam, or a market surge in the tech sector, or even football scores, they drop a donation for him. The main character in the movie is doing a TV news interview with him when he makes a prediction that she is going to die in the coming week. Later she asks him for more “visions” so that she can judge for herself how real he is. He says very simply, “I see, I say, you pay.”
He then explains that sure, if he could then he would predict the lottery numbers and hit it rich… but that’s now how it works, he sees whatever he is meant to see… so, “I see, I say, you pay.”
Now I’m thinking, maybe we’re getting screwed here in the Bay Area. Is there a Prophet George up on Market St. in San Francisco that I just don’t know of? If so, I’d hook this guy up with a cell phone and buy him lunch 5 days a week if he would just answer the phone once a day and tell me ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. It sure would beat listening to the radio for news. Hell, let’s make it lunch 7 days a week, and a breakfast burrito on Sunday.
My friend and co-worker Brian and I think we may secretly be on a Reality TV show… it’s probably only being filmed while we are at work, using hidden cameras.
The plot is probably based on stress. What they are doing is making our working conditions as lame as possible. Whoever quits first will probably forfeit a huge cash prize.
So far here are a few episodes:
Episode 1: Batteries not included
Every engineer has a UPS for his computer. The power goes out and I find out half of the UPS batteries have gone bad. Of those that are still good, half of those have bad electronics. Of those that are still good, half of them don’t have anything plugged into them anyway. ShaC has to figure out what to do while everyone complains.
Episode 2: Garage fire
Fire alarms go off and the building evacuates. When outside, ShaC is told to go back into the building to shutdown the server room. Upon return, everyone is told that the fire is isolated on the 3rd level of the parking garage. Good news is, the sprinklers went off and there aren’t any cars on that floor anyway. Bad news is, there is 1 car.. ShaC’s car… and his sunroof is open.
Episode 3: Is the building REALLY going to fall down?
A mild earthquake strikes. Not one to worry about but we better evacuate anyway. It’s best to not be in the building untill building management has determined that the building is structurally sound and aftershocks are not coming. Everyone leave the building and gather in the courtyard out front. So wait, if the building falls over, we will be standing right next to it… and aren’t aftershocks an issue for days after a quake?!?
Episode 4: You want it do actually DO something?
After hours of trying to figure out why a piece of his project isn’t working, Brian gives up and asks another engineer why it’s not working quite right. He is told that there is a critical piece that is responsible for doing exactly what he needs… Why isn’t it working right? It hasn’t been written yet…
Episode 5: Epilepsy Test Day part I
The local Fire Department schedules fire alarm and smoke detector testing for January 31st… But then shows up on December 31st instead (close enough). The narrowed down the testing window to between 8am and 5pm. YAY so they will only be testing when EVERYONE is at work. Brian is given random epilepsy tests all day long… with random flashing strobe lights and ear piercing screaming sirens. To add to the effect, all UPS alarms will squawk too as the power fluctuates in the building.
Episode 5: Epilepsy Test Day part II
Building maintenance decides to test the smoke detectors in the server room… without telling the IT department (especially not ShaC). By triggering the smoke detector above the server room UPS, all power to the server room is instantly cut, powering off every piece of equipment. When asked what happened they reply, “I don’t know, but it sure got quiet real fast.”
Episode 6: Sauna day
HVAC is shutoff to the entire building… except the server room. This means that it’s entirely possible for you to sit in your cube and work while the still air around you is 85 degrees. You will sweat and you will work and you will like it. In case you decide to leave, be prepared to take the stairs because the elevator is out.
Earlier this week I needed to ship off some stuff I sold on eBay so I decided to drag Brian along so that we could go to Hong Kong Bakery and get Dim Sum togo… you see, I feel more comfortable going there with an actual real asian. I’m more of a lighter-shade-of-brown kinda guy. I guess I’m afraid of pronouncing something wrong and instead of ordering yummy steamed shrimp thingies, I might end up saying “I’m a dumb mexican, please take all my money and beat me.”
Did I just stray off subject? Caffeine weakens my attention span. Please read on… I will stumble through this eventually.
Okay so walking through downtown Mountain View we see a guy wearing a jet pack handing out cups of stuff. It wasn’t actually a jet pack, it was one of those portable coffee backpack things you see guys wearing at Giants games or other sporting events held at incredibly posh and crazy stadiums. These guys were from McCafe and were giving out cups of coffee and coupons. We happily take a couple cups of coffee and start talking to the guys. By the time we’re done we have several coupons and Brian has talked them into buying steamed pork buns from Hong Kong Bakery.
So McCafe is owned by McDonald’s. It’s their stab into the huge coffee market currently dominated by Starbucks. Now their coffee wasn’t half bad… The leaflets mention things like “comfy leather chairs” and overall try to paint an image of an incredibly comfy cafe environment. I was really curious to see how their espresso drinks are and what the actual cafe atmosphere is like.
Did I bore you yet? Please read on…
Today on our way back from a Japanese market we decided to cash in some free-drink coupons at McCafe. With the address handy we started driving there. Just before we got there I suddenly realized, “isn’t that right next door to McDonald’s?” Actually, it IS the McDonald’s. They literally remodeled part of the local McDonald’s into a cafe. As you walk in, to the right you have your typical McDonald’s with your typical hard, plastic seats and catchup dispensers. Now, to the left it’s almost as if you stepped into a Starbucks, complete with leather chairs and cocoa shakers.
Without getting into too much detail and sounding like a review, it definitely has a cafe feel to it. Actually I would describe it more of an airport cafe look and feel. Very little merchandise and not very spacious. Compared to the Starbucks and Peet’s menu, the McCafe is surprisingly simple. After ordering a medium Flat White (latte w/o foam).
I would love to tell you about the drink but… well I don’t know how it was. In a crazy accident that only I am capable of, while opening a door I managed to make the spill-proof lid pop straight into the air and turn the cup into my belly. All I can say is that McCafe coffee feels the same as a Starbucks latte when spilled all over your shirt. Maybe next week I will return to McCafe and order a drink… and drink it there… and report back.
Web link of note: Color iPods (the case not the screen)
(At http://www.colorwarepc.com/products/accessories.aspx)
Web link of note: 18 Carat Gold Cell Phones
(At http://www.vertu.com)
I ran some errands during lunch today. Before we got back to the car I decided I really wanted coffee. Since I had $3 and change left over from lunch I figured that would be just enough…
… untill I realized I either lost my change or miscounted… which was AFTER I ordered the coffee!
After bumming all of Brian’s spare change and my change I had about $2.35… still $1 short. The girl behind the counter decided to cut me a deal then and gave me the coffee for that much.
I am such a bum. Maybe if it wsa just a regular coffee I wouldn’t feel like such a loser. I just bummed a double vanilla latte.
Web link of note: Nokia Chinese Input Phone
(At http://nokia-asia.com/nokia/0,%C2%B8,48860,00.html)
Sean turned me on to this. I guess he got the recipe from a buddy of his at work.
The idea is to simply help cleanse your colon and digestive track while replacing a meal (preferrably breakfast) with something a bit more healthy. You get all the fiber you need, lose a little weight, and have a healthier colon, right? Well yeah it seems to work out that way so far. I’ve got at least Brian and Rand turned on to this. Sean says he’s got Grandma drinking it too.
How’s it going so far? Pretty well. For the first couple days you will turn into a methane plant. Every couple hours a nice puff. They are dry puffs! No squirts. Right away though you do notice a nice “firming” effect. It can only be described as “logs.”
A few pieces of advice:
Now for the recipe:
I think this one came as a recommendation from a friend’s roomate’s ex-roomate’s co-worker who works at 24hr Fitness… so it must be a good idea right?
I was told that if you want to lose weight REAL FAST… eat nothing but Tuna and drink water and juice. Wait a second, that sounds an aweful lot like the Atkins diet huh? I’m sure I’m missing something but anything else and it just wouldn’t sound interesting anymore right?
Just out of stupid curiousity, I wondered how many day I could go on this diet. 2 days! Tuna first thing in the morning can make you feel plenty sick. Think of a hangover except you just don’t puke.
My cat has never loved me more.