If you could have 1 super power what would it be?

I hate that question. It’s such a stupid, lame, childish, annoying question. Everyone knows there’s only 1 right answer, time travel. Doy!

This morning on my drive to the office I started to zone and for some reason that question came into my mind. I started to wonder if I could chose 1 non-super power what it would be. I think of a non-super power as one that won’t neccesarily save the world but is still something pretty damn cool, something that won’t stop Santa from stealing the presents and leaving the milk carton open (at least that’s what happens at my house) but will still make all the girlies come a running. I was stumped… couldn’t think of a damn thing. Then when I got home it hit me.

The power to never lose just 1 sock.

You know that would be hot. Think about it, you could do laundry and know that no matter what your sock count will come out even. There would be compromises. My weakness would be that occasionally I would lose 2 socks, or a hole in a sock, or bleach a sock, but at least I would always have socks in pairs.

Damn that would be tight.

Both excited and annoyed that it’s girl scout cookie season.

Excited because girl scout cookies are awesome. I’m sure if they were available year round I wouldn’t enjoy them as much. It’s definitely smart to only push them seasonally. When I see those boxes all lined up on a folding table outside Safeway I instantly start to drool just like my cat does when I ring the bell. Yeah I know it’s supposed to be a dog drooling but I’m sure that’s only because Pavlov didn’t have a cat too, otherwise it would have been “Pavlov’s Pets.”

Annoyed because… well… It’s bad enough that I already crave the cookies but when those little devils look at me I suddenly feel obligated to buy buy BUY. Then I hear the siren call, “would you like to BUY some COOKIES?!?” Okay let’s be real son, we all know the hidden meaning behind their seemingly innocent question… “You want to buy our cookies and if you don’t then you’re BAD and karma is gonna bite you in the ass.” I’ve never heard them say those actual words but I can read between the lines. I know what’s going on. I will not be played a fool. I will not go to hell because I didn’t buy you’re delicious cookies you refuse to sell to me year round.

So you’ve been warned. I don’t have to worry about that. So far I’ve bought 2 boxes and I’m probably good for another 4 or 5 so I’m covered. As a Sprint operator once said to me, “Karma can be deadly.”